Finding Yourself


I haven’t written in a while. Things around here are busy, stressful and I haven’t been able to find the time to write anything. I honestly haven’t even had the motivation to write anything about parenting. But this week, I got to thinking about myself and how I don’t feel very ‘me‘ lately.

Being a parent can take a tole on your body and your mind and your spirit. It is a wonderful experience that changes your life forever for the better, but at the same time, it can make you wonder how you will ever get back to the person you used to be. In my opinion, you change with each child that is born and for the most part, it is normally a good change, and you may never see your former self again. I, myself, know that I am not the same person I was before my son was born. I am perfectly fine with that. I have learned so much, and have grown as a person because of being a parent. But, at the same time, being so consumed with taking care of my family has made me realize that I haven’t spent much time for myself since my first was born.

I am sure that I am not the only person that feels like this. Taking care of your children, your husband and your house can be awfully time consuming, and taking time for yourself can make you feel guilty. I know that I went out with my friends one time after my son was born and the entire time I worried if my child was okay, if he needed me, if I was having too much fun when I should have been watching my child, and so on. Everything was fine, and I did have a good time when I wasn’t watching my phone for a phone call.

Even though I was worried, I’m glad that I went out. I have already gone out twice since my daughter was born, both times with my husband. I followed my grandmother advice. She said, in order to keep your relationship healthy after children, you need to make time for yourself and your husband. So, we have both decided that we need to try to at least have one night a month to ourselves. A night of going out, having a real conversation that doesn’t revolve around our children, and enjoying an entire night alone. I’ve already gone through the stages. I get excited to go out, then that excitement begins to wear off. I feel sad, and miss them. That’s when I call my babysitter. My husband finds this funny, that I can’t go one night without making sure they are okay. For me, I can’t understand how he can. But, I know it comes with being a mommy. plus I worry enough for the both of us.

It’s important to keep your spirit up. It’s even more important to make time for yourself and your significant other, but the days can be stressful, and without that time, things can fall apart quicker than you can blink.



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